A Dream Is a Wiisshhh Your Heart Makes!

Hello, your Fairy God-Librarian here, and I quote the Disney classic song in the title because its beautiful lyrics and melody mirror the dream I have in my heart but feel to be too out of reach.

Lots of people have dreams they want to accomplish. I’m sure I’ve already talked about it here, but I’ll go into more depth today. I’m hoping by putting it out there in the universe, this dream will live in a more expanded dimension than just the inside of my head. This might possibly fuel the initiative it needs to become a reality! I doubt it, but who knows?

The dream to which I am referring is this: I want to open an independent bookstore. I want to include a coffee bar and an outdoor seating area with gardens where I also have a small kiosk that will provide gardening tools and seeds to sell. I’ll have a backroom where lessons will be taught: GED, English as a Second Language, child and adult literacy. I want my shelves to sell the usual: new and classic fiction and non-fiction in the various genres, but I also want to have sections that sell books in other languages, including Braille, with a vast audiobook selection as well. I want other shelves to sell STEM educational supplies, music instruments, and art supplies. The walls will display paintings from local artists like a miniature art gallery. I’ll hire a person to run social media, bookkeeping, e-communication (I want to be responsible for ordering supplies), and online sales who’ll also get their own office and work full-time. My next employees will feature one part-time receptionist-cashier, two part-time baristas, two part-time teachers, and contracted cleaning and landscaping services. Oh wow, six employees and two contracted services. That sounds expensive, I know. Would it be worse if I mentioned that I want to open this shop in Scotland? Yep, it would.

Insurance plans, ADA requirements, a security system, business taxes, a training employees plan, an employee lounge space, licensing requirements; the list is endless it seems. I don’t know anything about operating a business. I have no collateral or start-up funds. I dread the thought of getting bank loans. This plan is too ambitious, even if it were just for a plain-old bookshop.

But wait! There’s more! More? How can there be more? I also want to own a small farm. If the bookshop plan never pans out, I have another out-of-reach business dream. I want to have a small, organic bed of flowers and crops that I’ll cultivate myself and sell to local businesses. I’ll have chickens for eggs and a small bee sanctuary whose honey, you guessed it, I will also sell. I’ll have a large pasture out back that will allow a horse to graze and run. This farm can be anywhere; I don’t mind, just as long as it’s right outside a major city where I can have plenty of space out in the country but not have to drive so long for necessities or business requirements.

And again, I don’t know anything about operating a farm. I can’t wake up early to save my life. What do I know about owning and operating a successful small farm? OR a bookshop that also acts like a coffee shop and learning center? How is it possible that even if I could get the money and knowledge to open both of these vastly different types of businesses, how can I even begin to do both at the same time? Both a bookshop/coffee shop/learning center and a farm require full-time commitment. And I don’t have enough money to hire a manager at either of the businesses who’ll help share the time commitment it’ll need to operate successfully. All while being a writer? Not likely.

My dreams are ridiculous. I’m not even the slightest bit interested in business. Why do I want to do this? You know what, I should compromise. I should buy a farmhouse and do all that I want with it, but convert one section of my house into a small book/STEAM supplies store. That way, I’ll only have to hire one person: someone who’ll handle social media, online sales, and bookkeeping while I handle the supplies ordering, cleaning, and cashier requirements. Artists can still display their artwork on my walls, for a fee.

That compromise is still ambitious, even without the classes, coffee bar, and employee/contracting services. What’s even crazier is that if none of this is even remotely possible, I want to go back to school to get my Master’s in Library Science. I already know what I’ll focus on and what kind of a thesis I’ll develop: a focus in archival studies and public libraries with a dissertation on the history of the printed word.

It’s crazy. Overly ambitious. Impossible. Time-consuming. Most likely to end in failure and poverty.

And right now, only a dream. A dream that I’m sure will never come to fruition in any form. Not the farm. Nor the Master’s degree. Probably not the literary agent and book deals. Especially not the bookshop. Not in another country and especially in multiple countries. Only in the dimension that fits inside my head.

That’s why I compare it to the Disney classic. Despite what that song is trying to say, it’s founded on the baseless claims that Disney was so fond of teaching (acting like villains are so one-dimensional, it’s a good idea to marry someone after one kiss, adventures are real, heroes are only teenage girls with impossibly tiny figures, people sing all the time to release their pent-up emotions, and that true love exists). Despite the fact that Walt Disney himself started from the bottom and eventually went on to become a household name, the song is unrealistic. It was supposed to represent Disney’s success but only represents what Disney truly does: teaching children unrealistic expectations.

I’m aware of the reality. Walt Disney himself was the exception to the rule. Despite this, I still have a dream. It’s what my heart is telling me but since when has the heart been so great at making decisions anyway? Let the battle between the heart and the brain commence!

Love,

Lacie